My daughter is shy at first. She doesn’t like being the center of attention, and she gets nervous because “everyone’s looking at her”. When she does this I tell her “no one is paying attention to you but me and daddy”. It sounds harsh, but hear me out.
Having worked in marketing for 13+ years, there are two things I’ve realized about marketing and life: the only people who pay attention to you, or your brand, are those who love you and those who don’t like you…the official term would be a detractor, but from here on out, I’ll use the term “haters” to denote the latter group.
Those who love you make it a point to comment, like, retweet, favorite or, dare I say, call you to congratulate you on an achievement or help you get over a loss.
Those in the middle, couldn’t care less. They may like a post every now and again. But for the most part, you’re just another human humaning to them.
Your haters? They’re probably watching. Waiting for you to slip, so that they can directly or indirectly call you out on it.
A lot of us spend our time watching our every move thinking that everyone around us is paying attention. They’re not. Trust me. For the average Joe, like me and you, if we build it, say it, do it…the masses will not come. Nor will they pay attention. That’s why marketing exists, our job is to figure out how to makes the masses care about our brand’s wares.
Marketers remit is to convert the “meh” to lovers. And we reward the lovers with loyalty programs. And…the haters? They may always be haters – warranted or not. But you can always try to win them over.
How do you apply this to your life? Reward those who love you. If their love language is Facebook likes, like the hell out of their posts. Decide if you want to spend the energy to convert the middle/meh to “lovers” (pro tip: probably not worth it) – you shouldn’t have to win people over unless you really want to. The haters? Give them a show. They may not like you, regardless of what you do, and as soon as you stop caring, the happier you’ll be.